Civil protection

Fun with totalitarian police in the Half-Life 2 universe

Civil protection is a series of machinima animated shorts using the Half-Life 2 game engine and setting to tell the tale of two Civil Protection officers fighting boredom as they do their rounds in City 17.

Sunday 16 March 2008 :: by Thierry Gagnon

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Even though Civil Protection officers are the worst human traitor trash and hard-ass bastard thugs, they do grow on you as you watch the antics of Mike and Dave as they talk about stupid stuff the job, experiment with train joyrides or videotape Halloween security tips for youngsters living in a heavily armed, alien dominated, zombie infested world.

These shorts are entertaining but they sometimes suffer from a reliance on long-winded verbal humor that would benefit from a tighter editing. Nonetheless, they are still a lot of fun to watch for Half Life fans and for anyone who suspects that police-state enforcers are really just mostly sub-average chumps driven to violence and oppression by stupidity, the unrelenting tediousness of their job and the gaping emptiness of their lives.

Friday

“Do you know who keep stealing food from the break room? I’m asking ‘cause I’ve had my lunch stolen for the third time.”

“I am Ninja!”

“Do we have to got through this every Friday, when you act like a retard and I have to finish my shift with you?”

Aliens (Part 1)

“Dave, I shouldn’t even have to explain this. We’re uniformed officers on duty. That mean dumpster diving is not cool.”

Aliens (Part 2)

"I dare you to shoot it... Chicken!"

"Now, that wasn’t very nice... Bad Simba!"

Shadow of a doubt

"Hey! He’s not casting a shadow!"

This sketch also features this moving rendition of a classic nursery rhyme:

I’ve been working on the railroad
Every pointless day
I’ve been working on the railroad
While my life gets pissed away
Can you hear the whistle blowin’
Sending my dreams in the morgue
Can’t you hear the captain shouting
Wish I was never born

Halloween Safety

"There’s one thing we would really like to focus on and that’s mailbox bombs."

On a Rail

"This is sooo stupid!"

"C’mon man! This is gonna be awesome!"


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